Monday, October 31, 2005

Farmer 'breaks' penis

Ok, here's a good one. This old farmer was carrying a heavy sack of grain. He stopped to watch his hot young wife hang the laundry, and got so excited that he dropped the grain sack on his goodies, snapping tendons, etc. Basically, he broke his happy pole.

Read the story

I hate to say it, but this is hilarious. I know, guys are never supposed to l;augh at the misfortune of other men's goodies, but come on... This is freakin' hilarious and you know it.

Angry Internet Guy says, "Expect him to appear in a porn at some point, ala Mr. Bobbit. It may not be a good claim to fame, but fifteen minutes of fame is still fifteen minutes of fame, right?"

JOKE: Fart Glossary

Ok, so it isn't the most attractive subject matter, but it's funny, and besides, it's still in way better taste than the "You've got AIDS" barbershop-style song and dance number from last night's Family Guy on Fox.

Fart Glossary

ART FART: it's such a beauty you want to immortalize it on canvas.

ARROGANT FART: When you think your farts don't stink.

ASSUALT FART: A sudden attack that shoots virtual flames out your arse.

TIRE FART: You can't control the blow out.

BEER FARTS: These come out of every 'can' and smell like warm beer.

JAIL FART: Been doing time inside you for quite awhile, and finally makes its great escape.

DONKEY FART: Your ass is the only one that can do it.

GHOST FART: You can't hear it, you can't see it, and you can't smell it.

HOME ALONE FART: When you're home alone and a great one is wasted on no one.

SHOE FART: When you bend over to tie your shoe laces and one escapes.

TANK FART: When you refer to your farts as 'gas'.

OLD FART: You know how old it is by how bad it smells. (Also, a term frequently used to describe Angry Internet Guy)

BRAIN FART: You need to fart, but nothing comes out.

ALZHEIMER FART: A confused fart that heads the wrong way, and becomes a burp.

NOT-ME FART: When you drop a bomb in a crowded elevator, turn around to the person behind you and give a disgusted look and whisper "PIG!"

U.F.O. FART: When someone farts in crowded room, label it as a "Unidentified Foul Odor".

More fart jokes

More regular jokes