Angry Internet Guy

Bad drivers who think they're good drivers

You know what really pisses Angry Internet Guy off? Bad drivers who actually think they're good drivers. For example: As I drove down the road the other day, a lady pulled out of a parking lot right in front of me, cutting me off and almost getting herself crushed by my oncoming car. It was 100% her fault. I was obeying the speed limit, and she was sitting at the parking lot's exit the whole time as I approached. She had complete visibility, and a blind man could have seen me coming from this short distance.

She suddenly decides to hit the gas and pull out in front of me, and I have to slam on my brakes and screech to a stop just to narrowly avoid hitting her car, which already had several large dents, presumably from her doig this sort of thing.

Ok, so maybe she was distracted. After all, she was on her cell phone without a hands-free earpiece, applying makeup in the driver's side vanity, and munching on some sort of candy bar with her cellphone hand. Just the same, I could have let it go with only a single expletive yelled at her through my open car window, but she was having none of that. She actually had the audacity to give me the finger, and yell "Learn how to drive, a**hole!" at me.

Now, the old me would have followed her to her next destination and "shown her the error of her ways", as I have done with several drivers in the past. (Angry Internet Guy has no problem beating the hell out of a female jackass if she wants to act like a male jackass. If you need punched in the face, you need punched in the face. I don't care if you're a man or a woman, black or white, short or tall.) However, I'm not a teenager any more, and I try to no longer beat the hell out of strangers when they're inconsiderate. Instead, I go home and beat the wife and kids like a real man. (Kidding... Geez, have a sense of humor!)

But just the same, this is a good time to remind my devoted readers that not everyone will exercise the same self-control that I did. There are people who will shoot your ass for being a jerk. Think about that next time you give that quiet waiter with the nervous twitch a hard time at the restaurant.

Angry Internet Guy says, "Don't be a jerk or eventually my patience will wear thin and you may be the lucky recipient of a first class ass-whooping, and Angry Internet Guy is -REAL- good at dishing them out."

posted by thejake420 @ 3:32 PM